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My #ROTW photo pass

My #ROTW photo pass

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Gemma & Paul - Wedding, a set on Flickr.Gemma & Paul’s wedding - 26/7/14
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Gemma & Paul - Wedding, a set on Flickr.

Gemma & Paul’s wedding - 26/7/14
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IMICUS, a set on Flickr.Imicus @ The Green Room, Welwyn - 19/7/14
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IMICUS, a set on Flickr.

Imicus @ The Green Room, Welwyn - 19/7/14
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Sunsets The Day, a set on Flickr.Sunsets the Day @ Green Room, Welwyn - 19/7/14
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Sunsets The Day, a set on Flickr.

Sunsets the Day @ Green Room, Welwyn - 19/7/14
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Severed Soul, a set on Flickr.Severed Soul @ the Green Room, Welwyn - 19/7/14
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Severed Soul, a set on Flickr.

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Skreamer, a set on Flickr.Skreamer @ The Garage, London - 12/7/14
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Skreamer, a set on Flickr.

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Silas, a set on Flickr.Silas @ The Garage, London - 12/7/14
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Silas, a set on Flickr.

Silas @ The Garage, London - 12/7/14
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All things come to an end, even bad things…

So my relationship has ended after six months. I have been taken for a ride. Turns out he is narcissistic and was using his best friends death as an excuse to push me away.

The only reason he broke it off is cos I told him what I felt was going on, which was my mental health was getting worse cos of him being ‘depressed’ or more of an arsehole and as he put it, he was in ‘shock’. Narcissists don’t like hearing the truth from the other person. He first promised we’d go on break, but that was just to make it easier for him to break it off with me at some point. I tried reasoning with him, but it was like talking to a brick wall.

It hurt for a while, but someone spelt it out for me, what he was and what he was doing and now my depression and anxiety are at ease and thanks to being with friends I have my confidence back.

Only thing is I don’t think I could move on again for a while. I really loved him. Well the fake side of him. When his true self was coming out, I was feeling so ashamed and he even embarrassed me a bit. He kept breaking promises and usually he was only trying to get me into bed. I made sure it was only when I wanted to. I wouldn’t let him control me.

I had seen him since the break up, which was at a pub we both are fond of, he didn’t stick around for more than a minute. He definitely knew I was there. I feel a lot of anger and our paths cross again, I don’t know what I’d do.